I started crying when "beautiful, beautiful" by francesca battistelli came on. I know the song well.
I wish I could believe there's such beauty. But there isn't.
The church isn't where I found God, where I found grace, where I found beauty. They say their god changed them into something better. They say their god made them beautiful.
But
It's where I found evil, where I found the people who tear down, abandon and destroy. The church is the last place I'd go to find a friend at a time like this. I'm not welcome in their lives. I'm too "toxic".
I'm expected not to keep my christian friends with our fundamental disagreements. But I love them too much. I just hate who they are.
Love you Annabelle. Chin up soldier.
ReplyDeleteThanks mark. Sometimes i'd just like to be able to walk into a church, if only because it's something familiar. But I can't seem to do it. I just have such a sour taste in my mouth when I think about it.
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